Monday, April 4, 2011

The Dog and the Cat


Picture my mom sent me in a text. My new dad... Dog.
 Ok. I think I'm  back. Starting to manage the absurd schedule that is my life....

Thoughts for the evening...

1) Had a kidney infection this past week. In God's glorious irony, Santa Barbara had a Kidney walk this week....when I couldn't walk at all... because of my kidneys. Enough said.

2) I feel embarrassed about saying some rapper's names in the same way that I feel embarrassed about pronouncing mexican words with a mexican accent randomly. Does one just bust out with saying "fitty cent"... or really just claim how not cool you are and say "fifty cent". I'm not sure what to do. I'm ok with Kanye, but if someone asks me who sings the No Hands song, you will not find me saying, "Oh ya... thats Waka Flocka Flame". I most likely will tell you I don't know. Same goes with Fabolous. I just am not gonna say it. Keak Da Sneak? You are totally out.

3) People singing happy birthday is always awkward. Someone always starts too high and the rest of the time you are just trying to hit notes or listening to how horribly your friend is singing while lip syncing so as not to be heard...or maybe that's just me. The other day it was one of my co-workers bdays. It was the most awkward birthday singing ever. Small office. 8 of us. We are sitting in a circle with our chairs (no desk or anythign in the middle). An announcement is made that it is one of the girls birthdays. Someone starts singing. Birthday girl says no. That person stops. Someone else starts really slow. There is no cake. There I find myself slowing singing happy birthday with no cake to someone.. with no end in sight. Atleast when people blow out the candles that is kind of happy and all is erased. The mood changes. Lights usually come back on. Everyone feels more comfortable. Nope. Not this. Straight up just had to try to ease back in to the meeting. "Alright then... wellllll next on the agenda.."

4) About a month ago when the small boat of Americans were hijacked by pirates I began to think the name should be changed. I saw that maybe another Pirates of the Caribean was coming out this weekend. I thought about it some more. Whenever I hear on the news that pirates have hijacked a boat, I do not think bad guys with guns, I think one eyed pirates with parrots and stumps. This is wrong. I vote for a name change for the bad guys taking over ships today. Ya actually, "bad guys who take over ships" will do.

5) My mom has a new cat. It came on Christmas. Just out of curiosity I asked what she named it. "Baby Jesus". Go figure.

6) My mom also recently sent me pictures of Dog the Bounty Hunter. They seem unreasonably close to be taken from her phone. I guess he was at the Hilo Farmers Market. She said, "I got tons!". I might have a new step dad. That might be cool though... if I could take "the Bounty Hunter" as my new last name. No hyphens. Maybe drop the last name. Cecilia the Bounty Hunter. Nice.

7) I love when your friends do the head turn when you type in your password on facebook, login to email or type in your pin number at a store. It's polite I suppose. But the casual glance away is always noted. And laughed about in my head. Its absurdly easy to steal someones iphone and log in their facebook by clicking on the app and upating their status. I found out this the hard way a couple years ago when to my surprise the world wide web was notified about how much I had to poop that day. And to my surprise I wanted to de-friend the people who thought it was me and made remarks like "Cece  you are so silly!". Oops! Defriend. I hope this triggers some status hijackings.