Why are fish so thin?

I am done with school and may have a little time again. So... here are some things that have made me laugh lately....

 I don't believe that a stand up comic told this joke. If so, he is the worst stand up comic in the world.

I laughed out loud though... so.. that counts for something..

At the elementary school where I work with a kid sometimes. I wonder how many highly thought out 2nd grade "Your mom is a boy" jokes this spurred on for the poor kid. Also, if all this lady has going for her is she's this poor boys mom, she's gonna have it rough in about 5-10 years when he has her drop him off 3 blocks from school so he won't be seen with her. 

 #1 rule- Stop self-deprecating thoughts.  

 My heart my mom because my mom teachded me the grammars.

 The saddest giveaway pile at school. The epitome of manole. Just in case you can't see, there are graduation precious moments and bear figurines, like 15 video cassettes including one titled "Avoiding Common Discipline Mistakes", green hanging folders, a glasses case, a student health mousepad and a tree painting someone painted that nobody wants. 

 This is a psychologist we were supposed to be watching in class talk about something neurosciencey and important.... but I could not for the life of me listen to anything he was saying because he looked so much like Will Farrell pretending to be a psychologist that I didn't know what to do with myself. 

 Oh gosh. My luck day. Really? Free wire hangers?! Could it be! (see manole)

 Wow. A time control device? In Baja Fresh? This place is high tech. Serious profit margin on those tacos or something.

 This is actually just awesome and I needed to share with as many people as possible. 

Cut my bell pepper and there was a perfect sea horse. Felt weird about eating him.

Where did this guy go? Is nobody worried about spontaneous combustion becoming a real problem these days? Maybe he was just parked in the red and had to get outta there real fast... sans shoes. Can't let those shoes hold ya back when you need to make a quick exit.